Stringing Her Along

In searching for The One

You meet someone new and you think, “Wow he’s a hot looking guy!” You don’t make the first moves and as time passes you learn something about him that attracts you to him again.

Some of the things you’re looking for in a future partner, he’s talking about it with someone else. Claiming he’s this and that. Though it’s not obvious at the time what’s going on. Again, you don’t say a word but he does notice you looking at him while his friend is talking to him. A week later (you only see each other once a week), he’s standing a few feet to the left of you. The workshop is over. The fact that he dressed up really nice this day didn’t mean anything to you because you’re a woman who wants to be treated right. You’re a relationship woman. Since he didn’t do any “real” thing about showing interest in you, letting him go is easy.

The passed two weeks of his bullshit behaviour and trying to understand why it’s bother you had been somewhat stressful.

Yesterday what Let Him Go-and I’m OK Day. He was still sneaking peaks at me when, for example the facilitator talked about dating others and his head would turn my way when I’d answer to questions like my age. Then he’d say something in the group like talking about a female friend he’s known for 25 years and how they’re still connecting and helping each other out. Him with his depression and she with…I can’t remember what he helped her with. My feedback to him was to keep that friend of his for support. He just confirmed that they’re friends and there was that movement of his eyelids.

See how easy it is to misunderstand? Maybe I didn’t misunderstand. He sure gives signals of being interested in knowing things about me. If he just wanted to be friends he would have talked to me already. He easily talks to other women in the group. That’s what leads me to think he wants something more from me than friendship.

Even though I’ve turned my back on the past, some things now have pushed me to revisit the past relationships: my crushes. I’m smarter now. No one influences my decisions by saying things that lower my self-esteem.

So, yesterday what The Day for honesty. I saw all I needed to see about him and… good for me I kept my distance. I have no guilt for not doing something about that moment he stood next to me.

Life is a continuous learning experience, isn’t it?

I’m okay now and in total control.

If you’ve got boundaries, guys won’t hurt you.


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